The first struggle that comes from having a child with a learning disability, is that you feel alone.
You feel as though there is no one you can talk to, or share your feelings with. At least that was how I felt. I want this blog to help parents that feel alone. I want you to know that you are not alone, and that there are a lot of us out there.
You feel as though there is no one you can talk to, or share your feelings with. At least that was how I felt. I want this blog to help parents that feel alone. I want you to know that you are not alone, and that there are a lot of us out there.
My passion for parents and children with learning disabilities happened four years ago. It was when I sat at my daughters first IEP meeting for a newly diagnosed learning disability. Prior to that, I felt that I was pretty smart and involved in my children's education. I kept on top of their homework and their grades, so I felt comfortable attending this meeting alone. I knew Kassie was struggling in some classes, but I wasn't too concerned. I quickly realized that I had no knowledge when it came to IEP meetings. Nothing could have prepared me for that meeting. As I sat there with her case worker, her counselor, the school psychologist, and ALL of her teachers, the situation quickly became intimidating, frustrating and confusing.
I left the meeting confused and extremely concerned. I sat there and tried to process what I was being told, in what I call another language. I tried to interpret it and still remain calm while trying to come across strong and pretend that I knew exactly what they were talking about. I had NO clue.
The only words that stood out to me was an IQ of a sixth grader, never will go to college, special education, 5th grade math level, 7th grade reading level, never will go to college, try to help her graduate. I can still hear them to this day. Never go to college was the phrase that kept repeating itself in my brain. It was so much to process, and especially when she was in 9th grade. To sit there and be told that your child is so behind, and that her chances of going to college are slim to none is heartbreaking. When I finally made it to my car, the few tears that I couldn't control in the meeting turned into sobs. How? How did this happen? How did she slip through the cracks? How did I let this happen? How didn't I catch this? I felt as if I had failed her.
This blog is going to reflect a lot of things. First and foremost, it's going to be about Kassie's chapters. Because this is not her story. Her story is just beginning. These were chapters in her book. She has many chapters ahead of her, and god willing a very long book.
I'm going to go through the mistakes I made as a parent, and about how parents of young children can avoid the same mistakes that I made. I'm going to express my support and love for the teachers that helped and loved Kassie a long the way. And I am going to express my anger and disappointment for the teachers that sat back and watched it all happen and in some cases, made it worse. I will not mention the teachers by name, because I don't need any lawsuits. I hate that I can't mention the amazing ones by name, because they deserve nothing but praise. My consolation with this, is that I know that they do what they do because they LOVE it, and they don't expect or want recognition. It is their job.
And lastly, it's going to go through the process of me fulfilling my passion of becoming an advocate for special education children and their families. Especially Spanish speaking families who are twice as lost in those IEP meetings. It's not going to be an easy road, because as I start this process, I will still have my full time job, and I will be using all of my free time to read, research and attend as many conferences I can until I feel that I am truly ready to take on my first IEP meeting with confidence that I can make a difference in a child's education, and ultimately their life.
Fortunately, I have some free time now, because my special education child is away at college, the college she was never supposed to attend. And with that being said, one of my goals with this new adventure is to make sure that special education students out there, the ones that are being told that college is not an option, can prove to some of these teachers and educators that they were wrong. I want to help fight the stigma of "Special Education" and help these kids feel powerful, and find their self-confidence to face the difficult times. As a parent of one, I know just how many difficult times are ahead of them, and how many sleepless nights a parent goes through. There is no pain, like the pain a parent feels when their child is hurting or suffering,
On that last note, I am going to mention that a child with special needs suffers. They suffer a lot. They have emotional suffering, self esteem issues, confidence issues and that is just some of it. Is it a life threatening situation? No. However, everybody handles situations differently. I have always had and always will have empathy for other people and their situations. And although there are kids out there suffering the effects of chemotherapy or other health related issues. The pain can be just as bad. This is a topic that I will address with a separate post later on.
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